Oh dear. This is getting personal. Nicknames. There have been a few.
And we’re not talking Maccers, JoJo or your name with “-sy” appended.
But as the Loose Bloggers Consortium (see below) demands an answer, here goes.
Three spring to mind…
1. Bantam: Have you read the book Angela Ashes (or seen the film)? If so, you’ll be familiar with “stand-up, north of Ireland, Protestant hair” – the sort of hair that might have been dragged through a hedge backward – ending up like a bewitched barleystack. For some inexplicable reason, people have sometimes confused such a thatch with my own fine mane (see gravatar top right). Hence the nickname – bantam – sticky-up.
2. Irish: Paddy or Mick I’d find offensive, but somehow this didn’t bother me me. It was accurate. Not on the face of it insulting. I’m happy – proud to be so described. I liked the person who came up with it. I could imagine it as the moniker of character bound for the East Indies on a tramp steamer imagined by Joseph Conrad.
3. Planet: As in – “What planet are you on?” Hey, I think laterally. Does that mean I have to be from Venus? Or Mars? Or even further afield? Like Valparaiso?
So there you go. My nicknames laid bare. To discover what the rest of the Loose Bloggers Consortium are called at work/ lunchtime at school/ in the pub – scroll down to their links on the right hand side of the screen.
PS – If the identity of that planet still eludes you, let Small Clanger give you a clue.