Halloween – Should I stay or should I go now?

Scariest pumpkin I’ve seen. Not – I repeat NOT – at my house. If you’re visiting this blog from outside the British Isles, just google Jimmy Savile and BBC, or… I dunno… much loved national treasure, knight of the realm, papal knight – any of those – then you’ll understand.

Halloween – it’s tonight. But I have no children at home.

So – should I get the hell out of Dodge? Or sit waiting for the doorbell to ring? (The latter feels a bit lurkish.)

Last year I was thinking of three-headed dogs. Usually I’m out with the door knockers. Feels odd to be lying in wait. (See? Sounds dodgy, doesn’t it. And lying in wait with sweets sounds even worse.)

It’s time to lighten the mood, pep up the tone. A banana should do it, huh? A Halloween banana…

What have you dressed up as for Halloween? I was a Grim Reaper once – eerie but not really pushing any boundaries. Though I was a carrot one Christmas. I began as one of a bunch – but the others faded. It was a good night out in Dublin.

Anyway – time is passing – I’d better make plans. In case the little beggars start turning up early. (See below.)

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These are what you were looking for

I’m thinking of getting one of these gadgets. Any advice or lessons learned from people out there?

RIP Robert Degen: You put your left leg in… The man who wrote the Hokey Pokey is dead. (Or should that be the Hokey Cokey?)

Here’s a very capable communicator with a wealth of life experience who is looking for a job. He has an interesting blog too.

Think before you make a placard

And lots of fascinating stuff from the Uni Sociology Club at the University of Northern Iowa.

Like the top tip for making a placard: Think first.

A stun gun shaped like tampons – in case you’d be embarrassed to be discovered with a weapon in your handbag.   And how to make your eyes look bigger with LED eyelashes.

"Some squirrel nibbled the continent of South America on one of my pumpkins," reported Seth Masket. "It's freaking me out."

Finally, Strange Maps is the place to discover stains, bite marks, rust and clouds in the shape of countries, states and continents. It’s called Accidental Geography. Or more poshly –  cartocacoethes – which means the uncontrollable urge to see maps in everyday, non-cartography-related objects. However, Cacoethes is a Greek word used to express uncontrollable urge or desire, especially for something harmful. Strange Maps thinks seeing maps everywhere is harmless, if not downright beneficial. It prefers the friendlier term, cartococcygia, for the condition. Cartococcygia literally means maps built by cuckoos – analogous to nephelococcygia (a term for seeing shapes in clouds, from The Birds by Aristophanes , literally: clouds built by cuckoos).