On the internet, nobody knows you’re a dog. Wasn’t there a cartoon to that effect? (Oh yes. There it is.)
Same with internet dating. That six foot blond Viking type you met online may have been literally telling the truth. You only get to see that he’s also six feet wide when you meet face to face. Which is when you also notice that he smells like a Viking who hasn’t washed since they used to rule England. (True, happened to a mate of mate.)
Speaking of smelly Vikings – did you know they used week-old horse wee to kill bugs in their hair? Couldn’t afford combs. It was the amonia in the aged equine urine that turned their hair blonde. Does that make you feel differently about ABBA?
But the main point is this – how can you be sure that anything or anyone on the net is who they say they are?
Or if they even exist at all?
Well, I can now officially confirm that Padmum does exist.
Remember I asked if anyone wanted to come to the Summer Exhibition at the Royal Academy with me. Padmum – or Padmini as I now call her – immediately put her hand up.
And she came. All the way from Chennai in India. Chennai! In India! With her daughter Nitila. That’s them in the picture. In the flesh Continue reading →
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Tagged as abba, ammonia, art, BBC, Belfast, bill rogers, blackwater, blackwatertown, blogs, charles dickens, charles dickens london, chennai, chris wesson, comb, crimesceneni, Cultural Snow, day of the jackal, drumcree, Frederick Forsyth, friend, Fuxingman, gerard brennan, gurudad, hair, horse, India, Ireland, madras, malachi O'Doherty, mick fealty, nitila, Northern Ireland, On My Watch, OnMyWatch, Orange Order, Orangemen, padmini, padmum, politics, Portadown, prayer, prayer debate, RA, royal academy, Sam Henry, samhenry, sluger o'toole, Stan Burridge, Summer Exhibition, thailand, the cable, tim footman, trading as wdr, troubles, urine, viking, wee, will leitch, will the belfast journo
Hee hee – it’s great isn’t it? Whatever you were hoping for can’t be any better than this pic.
Blackwatertown 