It’s finally happened. I’ve really made it this time. I’ve invested in three films and one of them has really paid off.
I’ve just received my first huge return. I’ve taken a photo of it in case you’re sceptical.
Yup. There it is. A trillion smackers. $1,000,000,000,000. My good intention has been rewarded.
I’m thinking of buying a few trips on the space shuttle – or maybe 2,000 of them. Nah – something closer to my heart. I think I’ll spend it on Ireland. With Turkey thrown in too, if I can’t get change from a trillion dollar note.
Whatever I do, I can’t let the larcenous crew who got us into this financial mess get their grubby paws on my cash. Who? The bankers of course, according to The Big Steal.
Because my $1tn note is my return from my friends’ movie The Big Steal. They’re Julian Darley and Celine Rich, of Mysterious Movies – just two of the many outraged at the greed of the banks and the cynical way taxpayers’ money has been transferred to dodgy banks and then moved offshore or transformed into bonuses. So what? Lots of us are cross about it – but what can you do? Well, you can turn it into a film. That’s what they’re doing. The film will be called The Big Steal – but unlike most heist movies, this time the thieves are behind the counter, not breaking in. Can anyone stop them? Watch the film and find out.
But before you watch it – they have to make it. And they need help. They’re looking for lots of mini-donations, from a dollar upwards, to crowdsource the film and take it to the Cannes Film Festival this year.
So if you’re looking to bash the banking system and get a bit of retaliation in – here’s a way of doing it. Lots of good perks too. Being part of the film, getting your name in the credits, etc. And did I mention my ONE TRILLION DOLLAR NOTE? It’ll come in very handy because we’re out of milk and I need to nip down to the local shop to buy some for breakfast. Hope they don’t load me down with pound coins in change. (Though eek! They may not take dollars – may have to convert it to pounds sterling at the bank first.)
I’ll tell you about the other two films another day. I’m too busy mentally spending my windfall. Let’s see… If I put the Turkey back in the freezer compartment, I could trundle round to the cakes aisle and pick up Switzerland and Luxembourg instead – as well as the Ireland already in my trolley, and still have more than enough left for a fantastic night out. Decisions, decisions…
What would you do with a trillion? Could get a lot of marshmallows for that.
Whoah! They’re covered in marshmallow. Lucky devils.
This post – loosely based on Conrad‘s chosen theme of good intentions – was for the Loose Bloggers Consortium. You’ll find their versions by scrolling down the right hand side of the screen and clicking on their links.
Blackwatertown 
Thanks Paul – we hugely appreciate the support, especially as barely a day goes by without some new banking outrage! It just shows that in fact banking is one of the most creative businesses in the world. Makes directing opera or running Facebook look run-of-the-mill by comparison.
Pleasure – looking forward to seeing it on the big screen.
The combination of the splendid “The Big Steal” website and your blog has introduced me to a new verb, to “crowdsource”. My spellcheck/spell check doesn’t care for it one bit, but I suspect it is merely being huffy and old-fashioned. I cannot think from where it would get that attitude. I anticipate that your local newsagent, butcher, baker, and candlestick maker will look askance at your $1trn bill- but soon it will become the sought-after currency in the area.
You mention the possible purchase of marshmallows; therein lies another story in connection with the director of this august movie. However, suffice it to say that he will not be purchasing them anytime soon. And nor will I.
I am intrigued by the marshmallow story. Will investigate.
You bring the marshmallows and I’ll make my extra special fifteens!
Fifteens! Love them.
The Big Steal, great description for a bank. Actually it would be fitting if all banks were mandated to use this name.
Blessings ~ Maxi
truth in advertising?
That’s a whole other film.
Worthy cause, but the bankers will always win. 😦
in reality it certainly looks like you right – that’s why we decided to make a movie where the bankers most certainly don’t win and are specifically undone by their greed (and this time they pay personally). if we don’t imagine a world where we have control over our financial system, it is surely even less likely that we’ll get that control!
We can dream, can’t we?
May all your good intentions end in such trillion dollar returns.
That can interpreted in a number of ways – I’ll take the positive one.